An Open Door

An Open Door

I love this quote from Nancy Willard, used by Michael Stainier, “Answers are closed rooms and questions are open doors that invite us in.” Words are important. Words shaped into questions are hugely important. Words that develop what is called ‘mindfulness’ are the...
The Physics of Ask/Tell

The Physics of Ask/Tell

In our last post, we used this illustration found in David Rock’s book, Quiet Leadership, to isolate the optimal approach to working with and even communicating with others. In simple terms, we should ask much more than tell, and focus on solutions rather than the...
How to Improve Thinking

How to Improve Thinking

In a previous post, we noted the inadequacy of trying to change behavior without addressing the underlying thoughts about such action. We hover around trying to adjust what we see in others and probe their motivation, often appealing to their feelings of shame or...
It’s All About Better Thinking

It’s All About Better Thinking

Look at the illustration carefully. What do you see? Start at the top where most of us live. We routinely say things like, “Son, stop chewing your fingers. (results) Why can’t you find something else to do with your hands? (habits) Aren’t you embarrassed that others...
The Brain, You, and New Habits

The Brain, You, and New Habits

Recent analysis of our neural activity reveals that our brain is constantly trying to make past associations with new information. This is the reason we ‘fall back’ into old habits. A recent Duke University study says that 45% of our waking behavior is habitual,...